The Strange Moral Lines About Sex For Money

Andrew Carnegie once said that “He that can not reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot. He that dare not is a slave.” I was watching a nineteen ninety six film called The People Versus Larry Flynt. It stars Woody Harrelson as Larry Flynt, the owner of Hostler magazine, dozens of others and owner of about half the internet. If it is porn he likely has a finger in it somewhere – if you see what I mean. Edward Norton stars as his long suffering lawyer and friend, and Courtney Love as his wife. If you have never seen it, you should. It is a damn good film and my goodness it got me thinking about a whole range of topics. But mainly the strange attitudes and laws around sex. In Spain, where I am mainly based, the law is not an issue. Consenting adults can get on with whatever sex they want, money or not. But moral judgements, that is different. Hijo de puta! (son of a whore) is still a common term of abuse.

escort girl in red lace panties and red D&G sandals

I guess this is about to be immoral

So, sex for money. Let us take a bit of a look at it. Halle Berry won an Oscar and got paid for pretending to have sex on camera. Porn stars can have sex on camera and get paid for it. And many of them are celebrated and become famous and write books. But even in Ibiza for a firm like Ally s Angels, escorts cannot get paid to have sex in private where nobody else gets to know about it without either the law or peoples silly unthinking moral judgments potentially slamming down on them. You think slut shaming is a thing? Try being a working escort!

It almost seems that having sex for money is OK only as long as you publicise it and let other people watch. Surely that is not the way it is intended to be? Why is a porn star a star and an escort a social outcast? Surely (except for some people with specialised tastes) sex is a private thing that consenting adults have together? Go to any club and strangers will be having sex outside or in the car park. Or even in the club. And they will never see each other again. And no-one cares. But if one of them has been paid it suddenly becomes wrong and shameful. For the payee, never for the payer. How is that right?

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DO NAMES REALLY MATTER?

Escorts, harlots, hustlers, working girls, whores, slatterns, slatterns. As Belle du Jour played by Billie Piper exclaims in The Secret Diary Of A Call Girl “I do not care just what you call me. That is really merely semiotics.” What ever word you use, the deed at some time is actually the same at some time. To copulate with a lover you have only just encountered, in reimbursement for which he will most likely compensate you earnings.

However eventually of course, there will be usually warmth, lubing, chafing and ejaculate.

It does not differ too much, no matter what “end of the market” you are normally at. That nothing but changes the address and the cotton count of the blankets. It does not point exactly what niche market you labor. You could be truly blonde or redhead, deliver golden showers or otherwise, advertise your favours to human beings who basically want to be actually tyrannized and slapped around a bit and are truly into masochism. You might possibly be really a mega elegant girl at all times or let pass the majority of your time in your onesie. You might do dress up and have an extensive wardrobe of uniforms and sexy bedroom outfits. You could actually be truly a twenty two years of age “school girl” or a quinquagenarian year old cougar.

Female Ibiza escorts and the escort companies they partner with are usually privileged because they do not need to play such senseless games. In Spain it is usually totally legal to buy or selling sexuality, so long as the young lady is normally over 21 and officially able to being employed in the country. The finest of the sex workers Ibiza can extend may perhaps be normally a sexy older woman in her 40s with a hot form or a rangy lean French girl who talks six different languages. The finest high class escort Ibiza can provide may be actually a towering Vogue runway model or a petite curvaceous English hottie. That is a matter of predisposition. That is normally up to the client to make a decision about.

Still the trade of pulchritude and sex appeal for dough and what it can buy is usually always the same and are going to continue to be so as long as people delight in sex.

You could actually be an individual with your own web page and let pass much of your day on the smartphone and WhatsApp. You could quite possibly work with one escort agency alone, or be usually listed with forty five or more. You might just do work in a whorehouse, a gentlemans venue, from a flat or simply just go to regardless of what place or private address the consumer requests. Or you might simply do blowjobs in the back of a car.

It does not especially question however much a call girl firm might just use grandiloquences and lawful fronts. Everyone know that precisely what is actually genuinely taking place is really the interchange of your money for sensual gratification. I love it when agents have dissociations for instance, “This company delivers an intro favor only. Rates declared are truly solely for time and companionship. Any erotic activity that could quite possibly occur does so voluntarily concerning assenting adults” and then they list services such as unprotected blowjob, oral to finish and butt-fucking on their internet site!

Romanian sex workers persecuted in England

I am still not sure what amazed me most about this article in The Guardian. The understated headline, the random misogyny and sexism of the British Police and Home Office, the double standards or the fact that it was hidden and not front page news.

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Let me quote at length from the article:

A policy aimed at deporting “high-harm” EU-national criminals and those not entitled to remain in Britain is to be challenged by Romanian sex workers who maintain they are self-employed.

Among those detained and served with deportation papers are an increasing number of women from eastern Europe who have been working on the streets and in premises across London and Manchester. Many do not have convictions.

Prostitution is legal in the UK, although activities associated with it such as kerb-crawling, pimping and owning a brothel are crimes. Some of the women have been arrested by officers during raids intended to break up trafficking rings.

The women, mainly Romanian, have received letters from Operation Nexus officers giving them about a month’s notice that they are liable to be detained and put on a flight back to Bucharest.

Several women fighting deportation are now being supported by the English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP). “There was a raid which was supposed to be saving victims from trafficking,” explained one young woman who wished to remain anonymous.

The police took paperwork and money. I asked for a receipt. They said I was being cheeky. They wanted to know if had been trafficked and asked the client if I was taking drugs. He said no.

They didn’t arrest me but said I should be deported and asked me to go to the police station. I went along with a lawyer and showed a letter from a course proving that I was studying English.” The threat to remove her was eventually dropped.

Some of the women who were sent removal letters are now planning to challenge them on the grounds that they are exercising their treaty rights through being self-employed in the sex industry. Previous EU law cases have established that prostitution constitutes self-employment.”

escort Ibiza sexy body

All of which I might be able to get behind if self employed polish plumbers or Hungarian builders or Dutch farm workers. Or men at all. But its so blatantly targeted at Romanians,And women. As such it is classic racism and misogyny.

I don’t work directly with a lot of Romanians working as escorts in Marbella. But I do have a very good friend called Alex (real name, by the way) who is bright, honest, funny and very hard working. She came to Spain with a plan on what she wanted to do as a Marbella escort and she works her plan.

The idea that she is some kind of “high-harm” anything is laughable and stupid. And I am sure that there are many women just like her working as escorts in London.

I spoke with my friends at Ally’s Angels escorts Ibiza and they had a similar story to tell. The same with several of the best escort agencies in Ibiza.

I am sure that there are women who have been trafficked. This campaign isnt going to help them. And there are people involved in drugs and criminal activity. None of the women described in this article fall anywhere near that category.

And, just as an aside, since when have the English Police been allowed to seize someone´s property without permission, let alone a receipt?

Stopping now due to the steam coming out of my ears making a mess of the laptop.

Will Brexit mean a Brit expat exodus?

The short answer is no. Certainly not from here in Spain.

This article in The Times raised the question recently in a rather dramatic manner, such that The Guardian felt obliged to report it. Does anyone else remember when The Times was the official newspaper of record for the entire world?

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The facts, though, do not support the argument. And nor does apocryphal evidence here “on the ground”.

The Times quotes UN population estimates for 2015 which say that 1.22 million Britons are living in other EU countries at present. The same source shows that in 2010 the figure was 1.18 million. The estimated number of British migrants in the EU has therefore slightly increased during the six years to 2015.

The article says that 100 Britons have been leaving Spain over the past two years. That is based on UN data showing that slightly fewer than 309,000 UK nationals were living in Spain during the period, compared to 381,025 in 2013. The 2010 level was 319,144 people.

However, the article’s claim that the drop in the number living in Spain is driven by Brexit fears has not been substantiated. Data published by Spain’s national statistics office reveal that outward migration from Spain has increased substantially since 2009 due to the country’s economic woes, which have affected both Spanish nationals and foreign-born residents.

However, it is quite likely that the UN data underestimates the number of Britons living abroad because EU citizens living in other member states do not have to register their arrival.I know many Britons who have been living in Spain for many years and have not obtained an NIE. I´m not sure how they function, as without it most things are somewhere between difficult and impossible, but then I am fairly well integrated.

Even fewer go for full residency, as it is extremely difficult (and sometimes expensive) to obtain. Which is odd, as paying tax properly without residency is tricky, so you would think the government would encourage it.

I also wonder how the number of Britons is calculated – NIE registrations, local voter registrations or residency?

For example, in 2010 the Institute for Public Policy Research estimated that 808,000 UK nationals were living in Spain permanently. And that certainly seems like a far more realistic figure

In addition, as the piece itself states, there is no sudden increase in Britons returning home. According to the latest migration estimates from the Office for National Statistics 87,000 British citizens returned to the UK in the year ending September 2015. In the same period for the previous year, it was 81,000. And in 2010 at the height of the economic crisis and when there was no talk of Brexit, 92,000 Britons left. So basically, the entire article is tosh!

There are also a huge number of Spaniards emigrating to other Eu countries in the same period. And that has little to do with “Brexit” and everything to do with the terrible economic situation in most of Spain, and especially for young people.

We are fortunate here in Marbella in that we have a micro-economy made up of wealthy residents, and the tourists that we attract here are more wealthy than the general population. And that is obviously good news for my Marbella escorts!

As an aside, the article in The Guardian did give them the chance to roll out some of the usual cliches, including what Britons in Spain are like. Did they mention Marbella, or the successful business and club owners in Ibiza? Oh no. They show this…2984

I mean, really? Not Tibu and La Sala in Marbella, or the bars inland where everyone is beautifully integrated? Not Pacha in Ibiza, where my friends who are Ibiza escorts spend so much of their “off-duty” time? Nope. Fat middle aged men  surrounded by Union flags playing, incidentally, American pool! Grrr…

Its like someone doing an article about England and deciding to show a photo of a pub in Skelmersdale instead of somewhere in Chelsea where my London MILF friends might hang out. Or an abandoned park in some former mining town instead of sexy beautiful girls putting their wares on display in Green Park.

Everything is about focus I get. And the media are superb at controlling that while all the time presenting themselves as impartial.

So, back to the original question. Will Brexit mean that there will be a massive exodus of Britons from Spain? Only if the Spanish decide that the huge amounts of money spent here by Britons are outweighed ny the few people claiming Spanish benefits. There is no way on Gods earth that most expat Brits will voluntarily go back!

Kisses

 

 

Checking Your Phone During Sex…

 

I am fairly broad-minded. There are few things I haven’t done. Managing the best escorts in Marbella and having worked with the finest London escorts there are even fewer that I haven’t organised. And I don’t think there is anything that I haven’t been asked for, except necrophilia – though I did once have an enquiry from a man who wanted a girl to play dead. With his personality it was probably what he was used to from his previous partners…

But even I was shocked to discover a sex act that is so disgusting, that shows such little respect for the other human being(s) that you are with that it is staggering in its depravity. Checking out your phone notifications during sex.

Seriously, WTF people?

london escorts sexy woman

And then she checked her Twitter feed…

A friend sent me the link to this Huffington Post video which is OK but did at least get me thinking. Surely that isn’t actually a thing? Well it seems that I am officially old. I checked it out with a selection of my friends both in and out of the adult industries. I thought maybe women might be more prone than men because, you know, cliches. Or professionals than amateurs because they are checking out for business.Or people in long term relationships rather than the first throes of passion because actually Twitter might be more stimulating!

And it seems that it is an age thing, not a profession thing. Amateur friends were no more or less likely to do or experience this than some stunning Ibiza escort. But while all my younger high class escort colleagues and friends immediately understood what I was asking and thought it was no big thing, my older civilian friends and mature London escorts had the same reaction I did.

For me, if the sex is so dull that you are able to check your phone, then there is something seriously wrong. And if you are paying for a woman’s time and attention and still check your phone then surely you aren’t getting value? Well, it seems I am officially an old fart.

But I am still right, and it is still wrong. So just stop it. OK?

Kisses,

Bella x