The Strange Moral Lines About Sex For Money

Andrew Carnegie once said that “He that can not reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot. He that dare not is a slave.” I was watching a nineteen ninety six film called The People Versus Larry Flynt. It stars Woody Harrelson as Larry Flynt, the owner of Hostler magazine, dozens of others and owner of about half the internet. If it is porn he likely has a finger in it somewhere – if you see what I mean. Edward Norton stars as his long suffering lawyer and friend, and Courtney Love as his wife. If you have never seen it, you should. It is a damn good film and my goodness it got me thinking about a whole range of topics. But mainly the strange attitudes and laws around sex. In Spain, where I am mainly based, the law is not an issue. Consenting adults can get on with whatever sex they want, money or not. But moral judgements, that is different. Hijo de puta! (son of a whore) is still a common term of abuse.

escort girl in red lace panties and red D&G sandals

I guess this is about to be immoral

So, sex for money. Let us take a bit of a look at it. Halle Berry won an Oscar and got paid for pretending to have sex on camera. Porn stars can have sex on camera and get paid for it. And many of them are celebrated and become famous and write books. But even in Ibiza for a firm like Ally s Angels, escorts cannot get paid to have sex in private where nobody else gets to know about it without either the law or peoples silly unthinking moral judgments potentially slamming down on them. You think slut shaming is a thing? Try being a working escort!

It almost seems that having sex for money is OK only as long as you publicise it and let other people watch. Surely that is not the way it is intended to be? Why is a porn star a star and an escort a social outcast? Surely (except for some people with specialised tastes) sex is a private thing that consenting adults have together? Go to any club and strangers will be having sex outside or in the car park. Or even in the club. And they will never see each other again. And no-one cares. But if one of them has been paid it suddenly becomes wrong and shameful. For the payee, never for the payer. How is that right?

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Romanian sex workers persecuted in England

I am still not sure what amazed me most about this article in The Guardian. The understated headline, the random misogyny and sexism of the British Police and Home Office, the double standards or the fact that it was hidden and not front page news.

london escorts sexy woman

Let me quote at length from the article:

A policy aimed at deporting “high-harm” EU-national criminals and those not entitled to remain in Britain is to be challenged by Romanian sex workers who maintain they are self-employed.

Among those detained and served with deportation papers are an increasing number of women from eastern Europe who have been working on the streets and in premises across London and Manchester. Many do not have convictions.

Prostitution is legal in the UK, although activities associated with it such as kerb-crawling, pimping and owning a brothel are crimes. Some of the women have been arrested by officers during raids intended to break up trafficking rings.

The women, mainly Romanian, have received letters from Operation Nexus officers giving them about a month’s notice that they are liable to be detained and put on a flight back to Bucharest.

Several women fighting deportation are now being supported by the English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP). “There was a raid which was supposed to be saving victims from trafficking,” explained one young woman who wished to remain anonymous.

The police took paperwork and money. I asked for a receipt. They said I was being cheeky. They wanted to know if had been trafficked and asked the client if I was taking drugs. He said no.

They didn’t arrest me but said I should be deported and asked me to go to the police station. I went along with a lawyer and showed a letter from a course proving that I was studying English.” The threat to remove her was eventually dropped.

Some of the women who were sent removal letters are now planning to challenge them on the grounds that they are exercising their treaty rights through being self-employed in the sex industry. Previous EU law cases have established that prostitution constitutes self-employment.”

escort Ibiza sexy body

All of which I might be able to get behind if self employed polish plumbers or Hungarian builders or Dutch farm workers. Or men at all. But its so blatantly targeted at Romanians,And women. As such it is classic racism and misogyny.

I don’t work directly with a lot of Romanians working as escorts in Marbella. But I do have a very good friend called Alex (real name, by the way) who is bright, honest, funny and very hard working. She came to Spain with a plan on what she wanted to do as a Marbella escort and she works her plan.

The idea that she is some kind of “high-harm” anything is laughable and stupid. And I am sure that there are many women just like her working as escorts in London.

I spoke with my friends at Ally’s Angels escorts Ibiza and they had a similar story to tell. The same with several of the best escort agencies in Ibiza.

I am sure that there are women who have been trafficked. This campaign isnt going to help them. And there are people involved in drugs and criminal activity. None of the women described in this article fall anywhere near that category.

And, just as an aside, since when have the English Police been allowed to seize someone´s property without permission, let alone a receipt?

Stopping now due to the steam coming out of my ears making a mess of the laptop.

Checking Your Phone During Sex…

 

I am fairly broad-minded. There are few things I haven’t done. Managing the best escorts in Marbella and having worked with the finest London escorts there are even fewer that I haven’t organised. And I don’t think there is anything that I haven’t been asked for, except necrophilia – though I did once have an enquiry from a man who wanted a girl to play dead. With his personality it was probably what he was used to from his previous partners…

But even I was shocked to discover a sex act that is so disgusting, that shows such little respect for the other human being(s) that you are with that it is staggering in its depravity. Checking out your phone notifications during sex.

Seriously, WTF people?

london escorts sexy woman

And then she checked her Twitter feed…

A friend sent me the link to this Huffington Post video which is OK but did at least get me thinking. Surely that isn’t actually a thing? Well it seems that I am officially old. I checked it out with a selection of my friends both in and out of the adult industries. I thought maybe women might be more prone than men because, you know, cliches. Or professionals than amateurs because they are checking out for business.Or people in long term relationships rather than the first throes of passion because actually Twitter might be more stimulating!

And it seems that it is an age thing, not a profession thing. Amateur friends were no more or less likely to do or experience this than some stunning Ibiza escort. But while all my younger high class escort colleagues and friends immediately understood what I was asking and thought it was no big thing, my older civilian friends and mature London escorts had the same reaction I did.

For me, if the sex is so dull that you are able to check your phone, then there is something seriously wrong. And if you are paying for a woman’s time and attention and still check your phone then surely you aren’t getting value? Well, it seems I am officially an old fart.

But I am still right, and it is still wrong. So just stop it. OK?

Kisses,

Bella x

 

 

 

 

 

 

Taste The Bush

Hard to imagine why an advert that invites you to “taste the bush” might generate complaints in the UK.

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Typically subtle Australian advertising

Just read this in Huffington Post and it made me cringe and smile. Not at the same time, that would have made me look like I was having a stroke.

Australian wine company Premier Estates decided to push their brand with an advert and social media campaign that was pretty much certain to generate some controversy. Heaven forbid what they might have chosen to do so as a way of getting a lot more bang for their buck. Why pay for advertising when you can get the UK´s Advertising Standards Authority and the media (and me) to do it for you?

The ASA received eight complaints and then climbed on their high horse and pontificated with their ruling against Premier Estates.

They said that most people watching the ad would interpret “taste the bush” “to be a reference to oral sex, particularly given that it was accompanied with the image of the wine glass positioned directly in front of the woman’s crotch.”They said that because of that “the ad presented the woman in a degrading manner,”.

They also ruled that people would understand the hashtag #TasteTheBush to be a double entendre that could refer to Australian wine or female genitalia. Surely not?

I asked my escorts in Marbella and my friends who are Ibiza escorts and they just laughed at how pompous we British can be sometimes. They were also amazed that eight people complaining can mean that the rest of the British people are not allowed to see something…except via social media, the newspapers…

Personally I think it is the great tradition of subtle Australian advertising as shown in the Holeproof “No Knickers” campaign…

And I shall be seeking out the fine but reasonably priced Premier Estates wines at the first opportunity.

Kisses

Ione x

british union flag wrapped around naked woman with bulldog in backgroun