MARKETING SEXUALITY

Hmm … seemingly it just isn’t truly that simple to set up and run an escort agency.

So you get some cards made up. Being smart you probably use a local designer and printer because that will be cheaper than using someone like Vistaprint. So you pay a couple of hundred to the designer and the same to get them printed, instead of fifty through the web. But they do look nice. So all you will have to do now is put them in all the bars. But people will not let you. Or hand them out to people. But you do not have the nerve or the touts for bars and clubs in the good locations chase you off.

For now let us ignore the fact that if you do set up a place like Madrid or Barcelona you will be competing with world-class firms such as 2nd Circle. And that they will probably be able to attract far more attractive and alluring young ladies than you can. Because fornication definitely sells, so all you need is some young ladies who can fog a mirror, right? And let us ignore the fact that they have professional drivers, credit card facilities, people who refer them business, repeat clients. Male will never fail to shell out for sexual practice, so all you need is to offer it to them. Right?

But it is fine. Sexual activity consistently will sell. Adult males will spend for tits until they are broke or dead. Go you … good luck.

“Sexual activity sells” they proclaim. “You can continually will sell sexual practice” they declare. “Guy will consistently purchase sex” seemingly. Or my very own most-loved from Banshee, the absolute best TV program that practically nobody sees, “Males will shell out for boobs until they are broke or dead”.

You do not know how to build a web site? Never mind, I am sure you friend Dave can do it. He is good with that Facebook and YouTube stuff. Oh, it is a bit more complicated than that? I am sure there are lots of nice people out there happy to take your profits to build you a nice internet site. Ignore the fact that they have never built one for the adult industry, a website is just a site. How difficult can it be?

And on the off chance that you do actually get a call from someone who happens to find something you have done someplace, you do not have any working girls anyway.

So it ought to be uncomplicated controlling an escort agency in Barcelona then. Most notably if you are doing work in somewhere such as Madrid or Barcelona in Spain, when purchasing and promoting sexual activity is entirely allowed by the law (The Spanish actually have no laws with regards to it one way or another ). If sexual practice definitely will sell, and fellas will never fail to spend for sexuality, how difficult could it be to make large amounts of funds with little effort? All you will need to do is get a few women to do work for you, do some promotions, perhaps create an online site, and that is it. You will then kick back, buy your bright pink flesh-peddler Range Rover with the leopard print velour seats and set out squeezing money into your safety deposit box?

Well, yes. But how do you offer it to them? The internet! That is the way to do it, obviously. Everyone knows that the world wide web is basically controlled by cats to offer males the chance to get their rocks off. So get a website done (by cats) and off you go.

So you put them in car windows, only to find that there are half a dozen cards already there and that yours are removed after fifteen minutes by the next person to come along.

The next move is for you to place an advert in the local paper, because you can in Spain. Now the phone will ring off the hook! Except that because easily selling sexual practice is legal in Spain, and because sex continually sells, there are fourteen pages of classified advertisements just like yours, with women will sell blowjobs for twenty euros.

By the way, putting those photos of Beyonce and Billie Piper on your new internet site because you have no actual females? Not your best move. Enjoy the court bill for that one.

But then you will be on Google and the phone will just ring off the hook with hookers in Madrid asking to join you and males desperate to pay cash for a quick shag … ah, you can not find your site? It is probably on page 69 (which is ironic) because it is a new site with no backlinks to it (what are backlinks? Oops!).

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s